I was left there alone- winner of the field. It was the hardestbattle I had fought, and the first victory I had gained: I stoodawhile on the rug, where Mr. Brocklehurst had stood, and I enjoyedmy conqueror's solitude. First, I smiled to myself and felt elate; butthis fierce pleasure subsided in me as fast as did the acceleratedthrob of my pulses. A child cannot quarrel with its elders, as I haddone; cannot give its furious feelings uncontrolled play, as I hadgiven mine, without experiencing afterwards the pang of remorse andthe chill of reaction. A ridge of lighted heath, alive, glancing,devouring, would have been a meet emblem of my mind when I accused andmenaced Mrs. Reed: the same ridge, black and blasted after theflames are dead, would have represented as meetly my subsequentcondition, when half an hour's silence and reflection had shown me themadness of my conduct, and the dreariness of my hated and hatingposition.